Just couldn’t keep this one contained any longer. My blood pressures and sugars have been riding high for the past month because of it and this week just really brought it out with IGN.
Get Me to the Shop on Time
SPOILERS AHEAD FOR CIVIL WAR II
Marvel, Marvel, Marvel. Why? WHY?
There’s a good chance I’ve made mention of this elsewhere, but allow me to reiterate it here: Marvel sucks a barge of dicks when it comes to keeping a schedule with comic releases. It’s not exactly an uncommon problem in the comic industry (though Image has a way around it), but Marvel is by and large the worst offender of it. Of all the problems I have with video games getting yearly releases, I sometimes wish Marvel would hire the slave driver who ensures releases would come in with their whip and lash the backs of the executives to keep their asses in line.
This is so fucking unacceptable I cannot begin to tell you how badly it fucks up story lines. Marvel already has such a hard time with continuity without doing everything they can to deflate their own storylines and confuse their pacing. This practice is so fucking bizarre since it literally lets the cat out of the bag sometimes months before it should while Marvel is still hyping the mysteries which are already spilled.
Want an example? I have a perfect one: Civil War II and Iron Man in particular. Last chance. Don’t open if you don’t want to be spoiled.
This is the cover to the final Civil War II issue due out at the end of December. There's a question about Iron Man's fate, especially with this picture.
If you see this image and say, “Well Mak. This is daunting. What ever happened to him? I know covers can be misleading. Two months! I can hardly wait!” I’ll save you the time. We already have been told.
Oh, that’s right. We already DO know what happened to him. He died. And we knew it a month ago. It wasn’t Alonso or Brevoort or Bendis or someone slipping the beans. Well, unless of course you mean Marvel slipped because they did. Last month in the first issue of the Infamous Iron Man they talked about Tony’s death. Civil War II was meant to end LAST MONTH before this.
A FUCKING MONTH AGO!
An entire month ago when Civil War II was originally supposed to end BEFORE the release of Infamous Iron Man should have been the revelation of Tony’s death, but it wasn’t. No, instead Marvel’s stupid assfuck scheduling issues cannot conceive of how to properly manage this shit and AGAIN they’ve completely spoiled the big ending of their series. We can say all we want delays were the leading cause and that’s something Marvel only has so much room for error on, but that’s not even the case. Civil War II was meant to be a 7 part series and was bumped up to 8 at the request of Bendis. (FUUUUUUCK) So Marvel clearly has some control of what goes out and when. They could have easily bumped all their series back a couple months and taken a small hit on sales, but no. Fuck that. Why sacrifice sales when you can just sacrifice your fans on it?
“Well that’s certainly a big error Mak, but-“ Just stop there. Stop right there. “Let me finish. It’s not like Marvel does this often.” I so wish I could take a bat at the asshole who told me this in person because they are so fucking short on the memory my girlfriend’s grandmother with bad Alzheimer’s is better than that. Marvel ALWAYS does this.
Rewind time to a year ago for Secret Wars. You know, that scampy little “Change everything for everybody” pre-All New All Different Marvel event that was meant to end in mid to late 2015 but didn’t end until January 2016 due to multiple delays? There was a ton of lead up speculation of what was going on with the Fantastic Four. There was no solicitations and the Thing and Johnny were slated to appear in different comics. So what about the Richards’ family? Were they lost against the threat of Doom like so many others? I dunno. Just pick up Guardians of the Galaxy in October and find out from the Thing himself. The Richards were more or less off doing something else. Not dead, not in peril, just not there. Holy shit, the fucking end of Secret Wars was pretty much devastated because of that. Tension gone. Intrigue zero. And keep in mind all the OTHER series were starting up within those few months Secret Wars was supposed to end completely ruining who made it and who didn’t. Fucking bonkers. They lost sales because of that. People were actually worn out (more so than normal) on Secret Wars that sales dropped off more than they should have. We knew the Superhuman Registration Act of Civil War was going to be in place and Stark “won” BEFORE the end of Civil War for the same damn reason.
Now admittedly, no comic company will have a perfect release schedule. But Marvel has a loooong history of this. Anybody ever read Ultimate Hulk vs Wolverine? It took Marvel FOUR YEARS to get SIX ISSUES out. It was such a laugh that other writers in Marvel were poking fun at it in other books. It took Marvel over a full calendar year to get six issues of Iron Man Vol 4 out. That’s less than an issue every two months. They literally started a six issue storyline about the retelling of Iron Man and his rebirth with Extremis and spread it out as far as possible because they couldn’t get their shit together and have anything done ahead of time. First three issues out like clockwork month after month, then seven months till issue four, then five months till issue five, and then finally a relatively merciful two further months until issue six. And this isn’t exactly abnormal for Marvel. They are so bad about keeping time on this the “Marvel Method” has the added note of, “Release whenever it strikes your fancy” by this point.
And the worst part? I’ve already said it: Marvel can control this. They don’t HAVE to do this. A storyline is submitted before it is greenlit, so it’s not like Marvel told someone to write twelve comics and wing it. They know full well what they’re supposed to be doing. So what does Marvel do? Release as it is being written. Every. Damn. Time. This wouldn’t be so bad for certain series like X-Men or Avengers or clearly Iron Man, but when it comes to their Big Fucking Events? This is inexcusable. They cannot keep having yearly Big Events and then fumbling so hard each and every fucking time. How long do they expect people to keep up with this shit? Marvel isn’t Call of Duty or The Walking Dead (who is suffering a backlash for a slightly related reason) and this is a model which cannot sustain. Comics as they stand are on the burst of another bubble and if they hope to remain relevant they cannot fuck with people like this. They also have a lot of other things to fix, but this is a big one. Because they have to ask themselves? Why should a reader buy the last issue of an event two months from now when they know the answer from last month?
Oh yeah. Mark them up as collector’s items by plastering a metric ton of Variant Covers to them and claim you’re doing it for the fans.
ALL MY HATE
Last edited by Makenzye; 11-09-2016 at 07:50 PM.
Finally, another rant!
And fun as usual
Makes me wonder how comic fans can keep doing that to themselves, being comic fans that is. Then again, manga has it's problems as well.
Well, this is still meant to be a more or less closed off bit until my reformatting of Mak's Rants is done. Plenty to vent off about, but I've never really been happy with how this works.
And because comic fans are stupid ignorant dolts most of the time. We buy up whatever the companies sell at us in hopes it's a collector's item, or maybe just out of habit, or because we feel a story isn't complete without all of the issues.
And then Marvel releases another comic this week where they basically state Iron Man dies at the end of Civil War. Good thing there's still two issues of Civil War II not out yet!
Couldn't resist this.
What the fuck, DC?
Raising the price on your Rebirth comics?
You know WHY Rebirth was so successful, right? Because not only did you have a ton of comics come out, but you lowered the price closer to their 90's level which allowed people to BUY these comics. By a flipping dollar?
Wtf are you thinking? Did you learn nothing from your New 52 run and Marvel?
Wtf CARES about a digital download code? If I wanted a digital comic, I'd go pay the full price (and I have a whole shit load of issues about THAT) on Comixology or ANYWHERE ELSE than on the front of your comic. I read the comic already. Why would I download it? Future viewing? I HAVE THE DAMN COMIC.
"It's just fifteen of them." 15 fucking more dollars a month matters when that translates into at least 180 more bucks a year. And that's here in America. As others have pointed out that's considered relatively CHEAP for American comics. I can buy the entire first volume of Naruto for CHEAPER than that. And I cannot imagine you're going to launch any new titles for any less.
And you are CHOKING THE WRONG FUCKING CHICKEN HERE. It's not even the fucking guaranteed sales titles. It's the ones which are "at-risk." I get that you definitely know you can't get away with doing this to your Wonder Woman, Flash, and Batman titles since they're twice monthly and you know people will balk at that. But these are your Batman Beyond, Supergirl, Trinity, Batgirl titles. I mean, Super Sons isn't even LAUNCHED yet and you're not giving it a good chance. New Super-Man? You thought that was a hard seller before? You pretty much guaranteed it won't last the year. Cyborg? Yeah, let's take your premier black hero and make sure to make him MORE expensive than his more relevant contemporaries. Fucking SUPERWOMAN? Good fucking job. You pretty much made sure these titles will eek out a few extra bucks from those who actually love them while ensuring fewer people are even going to give it a chance.
Good fucking luck. I really loved your Rebirth titles, and it was clear the rest of the comic reading public did as well since for the first time in a long time you were outselling Marvel. But I guess maybe you were just afraid of success and didn't want the pressure of being number one again? Good comics at good prices is a fucking dream. You hate online piracy? You sure don't seem like you do.
Last edited by Makenzye; 01-18-2017 at 03:15 PM.